I’ve always been adventurous, impulsive really, ready to jump into that one next thing for a new experience, a new thrill, a new perspective. Anxiety is not usually something that keeps me from stepping out and doing. At least not since I’ve been able to grow up and spread my wings away from the toxic environment of my childhood home. I don’t usually doubt my abilities, which isn’t always a good thing when I decide to redecorate our entire house while my husband is at work and move furniture from room to room up and down stairs. I got this. It’s become my mantra of sorts.
Maybe because I’ve had to rely on my own willingness to dive in and get it done since I walked out the door of my parents house at 17; without a car, a plan, or more than $300 to my name, and never looked back. Being forced to bend and be flexible has this way of developing resilience in someone that you wouldn’t expect. At least that I didn’t expect.
But fast forward 8 years. Marriage. Two kids. A home. A mostly comfortable life where I know what each day hold and for the most part I know what to expect from life at any given moment. I had been toying with the idea of taking my hobby as a sewist to another level; to open up my own Etsy shop and develop an online presence in the marketplace, but I never could quite get out of my headspace enough to do it.
There were always reasons. I’m still learning. I’m not perfect. I don’t have enough time. I don’t know anything about business or sales. You name it, I used it as an excuse to avoid exploring this dream. It was a tiny dream. Something I talked about pursuing in the distant future and saved for that just right time. But it was a nagging dream. A feeling I couldn’t shake. Something I couldn’t stop talking about much to the chagrin of my poor husband and sister who probably grew sick of me analyzing every logistical piece of what it would take to make this dream a reality.
I’d get all ready to go for it, and then something would come up and I’d table it again. Shelve it for another time when life wasn’t so crazy, kids weren’t so demanding, school wasn’t so challenging etc. etc. etc.
And then my Little Man was born. And he has rocked my world in ways I didn’t imagine he could. I can’t return to my comfortable job where I know all the protocol and ins and outs. I have to stay home and take care of these babies day in and day out. But somehow I needed to come up with a way to help out financially, and achieve some sort of personal fulfillment aside from motherhood. Something I could pour energy into and call my own. All mine.
Back to that dream again. That pesky seed of inspiration that kept cropping up and dancing around my thoughts. Why was I so afraid to pursue this? Fear isn’t something that normally stops me completely in my tracks. It sometimes delays me, but never stalls me out completely. So why was this so hard for me to commit to? Why couldn’t I place as much confidence in my ability to create something people would love to buy as I could in my abilities to do a job someone had already laid out for me to do?
It took a lot of soul searching and the Lord shouting His truth above the whispers of doubt in my heart. It took a well placed book loaned to me from my dear sister in law. A chance encounter in my neighborhood fabric store who would come to teach me amazing things about this adventure. It took hundreds of conversations with friends and family and my amazing husband. And it took hours of pouring into God’s Word looking for answers and direction.
And through all of this. Because the pull felt undeniable and God’s promptings seemed to lead nowhere else but here, SewMuchLuvDesigns was born. My pet project, my tiny little spark of a dream has taken off in a way I didn’t think it would. I have an online presence in the marketplace. I have made more sales than I dreamed I would in just one short month. And I am honing my skills more and more every day. And I have this little hope of a dream, divinely inspired, carefully crafted and cultivated, that gives me something to do, someone to be aside from mama and wife.
A place to go when the crazy gets to much and I can recenter myself and receive a confidence boost that I can create. I can do this. God has birthed this in my heart and given me the ability to see it come to fruition. It’s been a wild ride. A difficult one. An expensive one.
But I am seeing this dream grow in ways I didn’t imagine. I am making connections with people I may never have met before. And I am loving every second of being able to create things for people with love and passion down to ever last stitch.
This isn’t a sales pitch or a plug for my business, although if you do want to check it out I’d be so grateful! Hopefully it’s a divinely timed reminder that if God gives us a dream, inspires something and births it into our souls, we are abundantly able to do what He calls us to do because He equips us to do it. He will manifest that dream in ways that we never thought possible and it will be more rewarding than anything else we’ve ever pursued.
So if you’re feeling called to step on an adventure, to take a new leap of faith into an unfamiliar area, to explore a passion you’ve been putting on the back burner; maybe it’s time you stop letting fear reign in your passions and start letting God’s truth infuse you with the confidence you need to walk out the dream He’s placed in your heart.
Check me out at SewMuchLuvDesigns.etsy.com and let me know what you think! And have fun exploring your own adventures too and please don’t hesitate to share the ways God has taken your dreams to the next level.